AWOL: Day 66
The Lord of Leisure has finally begun resuming his leisurely activities, much to the rejoicing of the countless millions who offered their lives to ensure a return to form, lying on the settee, watching Doctor Who reruns while consuming the delicacies of various nations, such as the slighty grilled, yet refined with Worcester Sauce “cheese toastie”, which we all know was invented by James Watt in 1803 while working on his bike,
This was shortly followed by tasting the rare and satisfying “crisp” which was invented by the Venetian monks of Belgium in 25AD which was a result of finding the divine answer to “Where did I leave thine keys again?”
Even the pope gave thanks during his recent visit to America, when CNN questioned his grace about the sudden turnaround in fortune for the Lord of Leisure, he simply remarked “See, there is a god. I told you so, didn’t I?”
So it was a return to the things that I enjoy doing the most. From the very moment at waking up at 8:16am the proceeding morning, a feeling washed over me. Something was different, but what? Not bad different but good different. There was a sense of not rushing, and after drifting back and out of the erotic freeview land filled with the female of the species wearing various levels of clothing, I wandered down the stairs with a smile on my face and a stain in my underwear.
It then dawned on me. The different was: you don’t have to rush around doing anything today. Go and have fun mate.
AWOL: Day 63, I think…
The Lord of Leisure remains entrenched in the Arctic Tundra, his work ever coming to an end. But having been by himself for many days, fever has started to set in with thoughts most foul occurring. Well, different foul thoughts other than the normal you come to expect.
It is a time of great concern when thoughts like this occur, a time of choice, and a time of gambling for tonight’s mystery star prize only to find it’s a toaster. Every man has gone through this throughout the generations, and will continue to do so until as such time, that like every Star Trek episode has suggested, we leave our bodies behind to torment the universe with mystical farting.
And for once, I’m not going to leave this vague to cause confusion and arousal at the same time. It concerns the females of the species. And that means trouble.
You see, because of recent naughty with various amounts of work and not having the right time sorting out skills, it is well known that I have not been having much fun such as writing articles for the blog, I actually miss the creative writing that I prided myself on ensuring what Ooh Sometimes would become, as perhaps a portfolio to be proud of and maybe as a steping stone to write for other websites and podcasts.
Bioshocked
While other things are afoot, it’s about time the text from the review on the last podcast was placed on the Internet with countless pictures used
This month for the choice of game on Gamer’s Corner from episode 2 of the podcast, it was a rather difficult affair to decide over, The Witcher was going to be reviewed but has been put on hold pending the release of the fancy dancy version which seemingly fixes everything I found to be wrong with the game.
Assassin’s Creed on PC just arrived in the post so that was out of the question unless I nicked the Tardis and jumped forward 3 weeks.
So that didn’t leave that many games to destroy in a audio shelling, with most of my time has been spent typing for endless days so this month, it’s a retrospective review about a game which so many adored for different reasons and yet despised by a fair few too:
Bioshock
Paul, you resplendent superstar of knowledge, surely reviewing a game that came out August last year is silly considering the world has moved on since then, what about Sam and Max Season 2: Episode 4, Sins of a Solar Empire, Spooking Jehovah’s Witnesses by opening the front door holding a blood stained knife and shouting “WHAT?”
Well that’s a fair comment, I cannot deny that Bioshock may be last year’s news and to keep it dragging out from the retirement home to dance for us is surely going to bring the wrath of social services for not treating the old girl right, but Sam and Max, the gameplay doesn’t really change much and I would end up spoiling the story because I can’t help myself, even now I want spoil the ending by saying that it was the butler that did it….oops.
Glastonbury’s still going.
Unbelievably as I type this, tickets are still available for this year’s Glastonbury, and you don’t even have to have registered back in February as this has been reopened as well. The excuse of the mud is still being touted as being the reason why they all haven’t been sold, a further 6,000 tickets have been sold, with a rumoured 30,000 still out for the offering.
Rumours are also rife with Jay-Z pulling out of Glastonbury due to the sheer negative vibe that has been received. Come May, we will know the line-up for sure and then people will either pull their hair out at how good it is, or as I suspect will be the more accurate occurrence, shrug their shoulders, not care and carry on with their lives.
However at the moment, it appears someone needs to go to the IIS web server hosting the Glastonbury website and free up some disk space, because at the moment, it is not available.
EDIT: Yes, someone finally fixed it, so you can carry on looking at the website.
AWOL Special: Is it because I’m Jay-Zed off with ya’ll?
I have taken some time out during my extended stay in the Arctic tundra to remark on the musical gatherings this year, and today of all days for a very good reason. It appears that the sales for Glastonbury 2008 are proceeding rather at a slower pace than last year. At the time of writing which is 6:23pm on the Sunday, tickets are still available for those who registered their details earlier this year.
The same time last year, tickets sold out in three hours.
A lot of people attribute the fall of interest in the fact that this year, the headliners are not exactly artists which get the blood flowing to the various organs. Kings Of Leon, Jay-z and The Verve are the main acts with others so far including Leonard Cohen, Neil Diamond, Elbow, Kate Nash, Goldfrapp, The Editors, The Enemy, Dizzee Rascal, Jimmy Cliff and lastly The Fratellis.
Jay-Z has had a lot of attention thrust upon him as his music isn’t strictly in keeping with what the white middle-class mixture of pi**ed up uni students, old people and stag parties come to expect from Glastonbury. They expect rocky folky type music during the day and evening, with dance music from Fatboy Fat or Mobo to try and cop off with members of the opposite sex to and why not?
AWOL: Day 52
A man emerged from the mildly frost free sleeping back and observed the view. All around was whiteness beyond the human imagination. Another day, another currency of your choice, he muttered through the lips that were surrounded by a beard that would have made Grizzly Adams proud.
The weather had died down again for another transmission to make it through, more than just text this time for the people back home to take comfort that the one man which is lazy for all mankind, was indeed able to drink and sit down as normal, just in sub zero conditions. A photograph has been taken of the native landscape and provided here for your viewing mastication:
But the Lord knows his work is not yet over. Though a mere 7 weeks remain until his work is done and he can resume the duties of being leisurely, a remote control in one hand and well, it’s best left alone what the other hand’s doing.
GWJ: Yes, it’s happened.
Yes friends, the audio naughty that was indicated during the last post from the Arctic wastelands, is indeed another Gamers with Jobs podcast, however the Lord of Leisure took time out from his busy schedule of watching TV to add ever so silly comments to this global phoenomomonomomon.
During this episode, a great many things were discussed such as cross-gaming between the Xbox and PC thanks to Universe at War and Petroglyph’s Chris Ainsworth was along to talk about that aspect of things, but also various other enterprises were afoot including, and it’s hugely surprising that it’s still in there, there is talk about how people will be drawing naughty man bits with the Nintendo Wii.
However I’m the only one on the thing who sounds like he’s hiding in an empty baked bean tin.
[display_podcast]
(28.4MB, Show time is 1 Hour, 38 Seconds)
Warning: Contains uncensored swearing and mentions things that make the various gods cry…
Now, as to how this happened, it’s slightly bizzare as this wasn’t a arranged thing at all, I really was watching some TV very late and was about to head off to bed, when Skype went off and I was asked if I wanted to participate.
Given the alternative of sleep, it was a tough decision…so I stayed up, no idea of what was going on and what to say, partially as it was then 1am. All I can say is that it was a real learning experience, about how the podcast is created, and also there was a lot of talk which would never make the final cut which was just so funny, it’s a shame that some of it will never see the light of day.
So there we are, some small amount of fame and it appears there is now to be a queue in terms of who the next token British guy will be on GWJ. So please give the GWJ posse the respect that they deserve. And if there is a next time, I’ll make sure I indeed do stay out of the tin. Dear me…. 🙂
AWOL: Day 46
After an extended period of staying in, the cold chilling to the bone and parts beyond, The Lord of Leisure sits with his banjo, a cup of tea and a copy of the Angling Times, simply because the local polar bears up the street are hosting a dinner party and don’t wish to be seen with the riff-raff as they put it. Being a Lord of Leisure isn’t enough it seems…
Due to complications with the digestion system, the Lord did not make a public appearance in Manchester, with all the fans who were waiting, all disappointed. Or maybe 3 people, whichever sounds better. It was a great shame, and will have to be made up at some point, maybe with the give away of a keyring. Do people want key rings these days?
And now to stop referring to myself in the third person for the rest of the post, to the clan of Manchester, (Glyn, Kelly and the birthday lady, Christine with countless others) I will make it up there again now that the trouble seems to have subsided for the moment. But for how long? (cue music of doom with woman from the 50’s screaming)
During this weekend period of drinking vast quantities of drugs, more viewings of Flight of the Conchords occurred, along with updating the website to run on the newer version of WordPress, so there may be improvements to be seen as a result in terms of speed but other than that, the website looks the same and functions the same.
AWOL: Day 43
After a restful night, with the wind howling outside, and the penguins getting annoyed after losing yet another hand of poker, it appears that the slight worry was indeed all for nothing. Turns out it was just really bad indigestion. And yet if you’re going through it, you cannot help but think treachery was afoot. In any case, the need to keep taking the vast quantities of digestive wonder drugs is still very much present, to make sure all is well.
The Arctic tundra today is still, with only a mild snowstorm and -26 temperature to contend with. While the lapse in the blizzard is here, the lord will boldly venture out and enjoy the frosty morn before settling down with a good book later on. Rest today, for who knows what tomorrow brings.