In a result no polls saw coming nor indeed, it appears most of the politicians themselves who had been campaigning over the past few weeks, we now have a UK government lead by the new supreme overlord elect, David Cameron, no longer being the Captain of the Coalition, but instead the leader of an overall Conservative government. Whom it appears no-one has been able to use any other word other than “smug” to describe as he went through the doors of Number 10 with his wife.

So what happened to the rest of them then since it emerged as to whom who was nicking the keys to that modest little house next to Big Ben? How did this happen? And also what’s going to be next for us here in the UK?

Well as we like to have occasionally some facts to back up what we say on this blog (well, making it up is often far more enjoyable) you can see how the votes were shared out and who got voters tongues waggling with lust courtesy of the BBC;

mmmm…..sexy bar graphs…..

In terms of what happened to the rest of the parties after they failed, Labour are now leaderless too, with Ed Miliband basically saying sorry and buggering off after the politician they call Balls (heh heh, Balls….) failed to get his seat in whatever place it was. It was a right balls-up, HA HA, bad word play! Not to worry, there are lots of people wanting the job now and I’m sure it will again be someone everyone can get behind to hate all over again. Good times.

The Liberal Democrats are all but gone and indeed Paddy Ashdown has eaten some hat cake after what he proclaimed on the BBC about an exit poll. Well he had to really, given that Nick Clegg has now wandered off into the sunset, given that his party was punished for the last government’s actions.

UKIP, despite a lot of the coverage on them, failed to do anything massive in a lot of the UK, bar the one MP with about 4 million votes, and as a result now Nigel Barrage is down the pub drinking with everyone else who basically are wondering what’s going to happen now given he also resigned too.

56 happy campers next to a bridge.

Only the SNP and the people of Scotland who basically had enough of everyone else, are truly still are going to be still feeling that they are flying higher than a hippy at the third day of an open air festival, given that the 56 MPs they managed to get on Thursday, all turned up next to a lovely bridge to have their picture taken.

They of course go to Westminster now to ensure that they are able to bare their arses during Prime Minister’s Question Time and demand that Mel Gibson never be allowed in Scotland ever again.

So how did the Conservatives get back into power, with a majority too this time?

Well for lack of a better way of putting it, the politics of fear won the day.

The campaigns ran by a lot of the parties was not about what they could do to improve things and acknowledge where they may have failed before and what they could do to put those issues right, but rather what could happen if others got in.

The Tories, basically made everyone sh*t themselves with a thought of the Labour and SNP parties working together, along with wheeling out a letter over and over again saying there was no money from an outgoing Labour bloke in 2010, something which would go on to help the cause of the Conservatives.

UKIP scared the electorate about the EU and their own party really given some of the hijinks they got up to. Labour themselves scared people about what basically everyone else would do while basically hoping they would get the votes because they weren’t the Tories. Well, Ish.

And….err… I guess the Green Party scared us about something too? Haven’t really any idea on that one to tell the truth, as the media themselves also helped to scare the cr*p out of everyone too, and thus drive home the narrative that various parties put forward, in addition to whatever agendas they had for what they wanted the public to do.

But that leads onto what is going to happen next, and of course what was written about the election last time on here….

Perhaps not the best way to get the message across, eh chaps? (Yes, this actually happened….)

Seems though that some people are more unhappy with the result than others with their recent actions demonstrating outside Downing Street, police fighting back and a small group of the protesters (or as others would say, dopey b*stards) defacing of a monument on Whitehall as you can see above, with potential other disruption further down the line already being talked about, that we will be in for a rough ride to come.

There are now various policies back on the table, like the monitoring more of all communications, which of course, was remarked about previously here at Ooh Sometimes, albeit around the trolling and other proposals at the time.

In the news, the new Justice Secretary, Michael Gove, hot of getting everyone to hate him when he pretended to care about Education, will be leading through the abolishment of the Human Rights act, and thanks to the Independent telling us, at one point wanted “Hanging” brought back apparently. Feel all warm inside now….

Oh and don’t forget those cuts to welfare and other things are no doubt coming, but we still don’t know where they will come from. The fine details about how anything would be done were left out of everyone’s campaigns, don’t forget. But then again, that’s politics to a tee; never tell the truth.

The referendum on the EU is now on the horizon, as we decide whether or not to remain in the EU, with unforeseen consequences looming, given that it is doubtful that any rational debate on the subject will take place. It’s safe to say that  we should expect more of the politics of fear to take place.

Alex Salmond put his foot in it, by saying the SNP being in power in Scotland was a step closer to independence despite the leader, Nicola Sturgeon saying otherwise during the election campaign, so clearly that is not going away any time soon.

I had written the day before everyone went to the polls this;

Go vote on the 7th May, but be prepared to get screwed over more as we have people in power who can put more dog food on expenses, cuts come for services and prices go up anyway year after year no matter who gets in.

The question will really be…..how much are we all about to get screwed over? A little, or a lot?

We will soon have that answer. Then it may be better to move to Scotland after all.