No sooner had the second part of a 10 part trilogy come to a close, that something else with government backing makes its way into the news, it’s almost as if someone thought two long winded rants about how governing bodies and the internet don’t really go well together, were not enough.

No, he’s not a troll

In the UK today, it was announced that websites will soon be forced to identify people who have posted defamatory messages online or “Trolling”.

The proposals state that victims will have a right to know who is behind anything which is classed as cyber-bullying without the need for calling lawyers-4-U and pretending you had an accident at work.

This appears to have come on the back of three recent stories, from various sources like the BBC, Telegraph and Independent, in which examples were given of people going to extreme lengths

It seems though that the media struggled for a better phrase to use other that cyber-bullying, like Robo-buggering or Net-beatingthecrapoutofyouandstealingyourlunchmoney. So it seems to have settled on Trolling.

But here’s the thing. It’s not technically the exact same thing (of course when’s that stopped the media before).

To begin with, what is a troll on them internets?

From Wikipedia itself: “a troll is someone who posts inflammatory, extraneous, or off-topic messages in an online community, such as an online discussion forum, chat room, or blog, with the primary intent of provoking readers into an emotional response or of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion.”

Most of the time, when this phrase is used, it’s when people post some crap when they’re bored, and just seeing what happens. Pretty much the basis for this blog actually, and most of the time, everyone just sighs, and carry on with scratching themselves and whoever else was around.

However, Bullying, in any shape or form, is thretening another person directly with violence either physical or mental repeatedly and it’s hard to view the stories about said trolling as anything but people losing their minds.

No, he’s more of a goblin king.

In the case of Louise Mensch, the MP who was threatened along with several other celebrities it seems as mentioned in the Independent article, you take a look at the fella Frank Zimmerman’s history (picture on the left, yes, that’s really him.) who sent the crap in the first place, and you may reach the conclusion that he’s not firing on all cylinders.

First of all, he’s agoraphobic which means he stays in a lot, so him really leaving the house to do anything is a wee bit unlikely and secondly, he looks like a stand-in for Dumbledore from Harry Potter so how the hell could you not see him coming (troll!)?

The BBC story, illustrates something far worse where a dead girl who killed herself under a train after some crap exchanged on Facebook. Her Facebook page was then defiled, and it was all by the same f*ckwit who apparently suffers with alcohol problems and has Asperger’s syndrome. Judging from his appearance, it does also appear he would make all major decisions by head-butting. (troll!).

As for the telegraph story with Nicola Brookes, frankly, I’ve got nothing. It’s just beyond belief what happened there. I mean, for starters, she posted about about the X Factor. (troll!)

The story does highlight more criminal activity on the social me-idiots part than anything else and credit due here in many respects, Nicola was right to take the action she did given the nature of what lengths they went to, but given who would hurl abuse over the X Factor, another fine staple of Saturday mind-mush, you’re not going to be dealing with members of Mensa on the subject, more likely sand people from Star Wars.

It raises the question; When did we as a society start taking random nonsensical crap committed by retarded monkeys on the internet so damned seriously? And why are people so bored/mental to take things too far?

It had never even occurred to me that crap written by someone could be taken so far over the top that people had to take legal action against them nor in fact, would convince someone to take the 19:58 to death, calling at Basingstoke. Which probably means when Sky News brought the story up, I probably shouldn’t have been laughing so much.

If new laws are enacted, does that mean that we have to watch far more what we say, even in jest, given that the meaning of text without knowing the person involved, can be misinterpreted in many ways? As for uncovering identities, what about when people express their views on topics anonymously for fear of losing their job for example and that is interpreted as trolling?

Now that’s a troll!

In a way, we’ve all been “trolling” for centuries.

It just took a different form, for example moaning about your boss looking like a sh*t stain or couples talking crap about each other on the Jeremy Kyle show. It’s been in columns in newspapers for decades, tv programmes, radio phone-in shows, it’s all the same damned thing. Best part is, it will carry on forever more, unless we’re all censored from saying anything at all, just in case.

It’s also simply known by another name: Bitching.

Reading the stories presented, the whole sorry business seems ridiculous, because in many ways, it is.

Parents, it’s time to tell little Timmy not to pay attention to silly things on said internets because everyone his age are not really grown-up yet. Or everyone his age is stupid, whichever works. Also tell Timmy not to play Daddy’s private video collection he keeps for when mummy’s not around.

In the meantime, anything truly criminal as per the three stories, well, it appears it gets dealt with anyway as it should be, therefore surely no further legislation should be required?

By the way, your arse is too big and you have no friends! (troll!)