Hello. I’m Paul Hughes. You may remember from such disasters as inventing solar powered street lighting which only works during the day, and finding ways to hide the TV remote control under folds of fat.

It’s been two long months since the last post on OohSometimes, and in that time a lot of weird and some would say wonderful stuff has happened in that time. Let’s have a recap;

A US Congressman called Anthony Weiner had to walk away from his job after posting a picture of his Weiner to lucky ladies on the internet.

Osama Bin Lid is finally dead, being killed by Seal Team 6 (the other 5 were busy riding roller-coasters and playing crazy golf) in a nice house in Pakistan, next to a miltary compound. Shocking revelations which came from the raid in the days afterward included the facts that he liked porn and watching TV.

Gay marriage is now allowed in New York. Heterosexuals happy that all orientations can experience same life-sucking joyless misery as them.

UK Education Secretary Micheal Gove warned teachers over their planned strike which took place; they will be held after class if they’re naughty.

The long awaited Duke Nukem Forever finally arrived after 14872372393 years in development and pretty much is lamented by everyone, to the point the dev teams behind it are now on trial for crimes aganist humanity and will be sentenced to death by listening to Barney the Purple Dinosaur sing, causing huge loss of blood through the ears.

Fighting in Libya continues, but now is being fought using elastic bands and hitting each other with plastic rulers amid huge cost cutting by both sides.

A huge discovery in that pouring certain liquids down a drain allow for a sensation of the senses to go wild and for hair to fall out.

In other news, I’ve had to move to a new place and get various lies, treachery and deceit in place in order to get back to a semblance of laziness once more, and in a bizzare sentence to write for most, let alone read, get used to having a proper supermarket nearby.

Do not underestimate the simple pleasure of having a supermarket close by selling more than just bread and tubs of lard because they cannot squeeze any more into the tiny space they decided would be a good idea to open up shop in the first place, and even better, the cheaper prices of standard goods, in London, it’s just as good as being told that 12 supermodels all want you and then feel it’s their duty to wrestle each other for your filthy pleasure.

There are other pleasures that simply must be described which will make by far a very entertaining post which will dazzle and disgust all of you, but it’s late and I’m out of material. Stay tuned for more in the coming days where hopefully normal (or whatever counts for normal on this digital tome) service will resume and there will be lovely pictures to go along with it too.

Also if anyone wants to have anything discussed in detail on here, then please leave a note in the contact section, twitter, facebook, air-mail, smoke signal or hand fart.