On May 6th, the British public, after gorging themselves silly on the jolly good times that is to come from the forthcoming Royal Wedding at which point it seems nothing else will ever come close to matching in terms of joy if the media is to be believed, will be asked whether they want to replace the existing first-past-the-post system for electing various drunk old farts with money problems or as three people still know them as: Members of Parliament to Westminster with a method known as the alternative vote (which apparently is AV for short, wonderful what things we can come up with these days).

Basically the current voting system some people aren’t happy with due to the election result of last year and they want to see if anyone else actually gives a crap in the same fashion to get it changed. It was agreed that this would take place under the Pirates of the Collation agreement so it was going to happen regardless.

But it seems that generally the vast majority couldn’t give a rats’ ass and are more concerned with what woman from that Essex show they are going to hate the most. Which is why over the past couple of days, more and more literature has been dropping through the post;

First, the Pro AV side.

They make the argument that being an MP is a job for life as pretty much in a lot of areas, the MPs don’t have to do anything to get your vote to stay in booze and goods from John Lewis. Therefore the AV will make them work for your vote, for the first time probably. Also even if you didn’t vote for wins, your vote still then counts due to you putting a preference next to each candidate.

But putting this is not enough so let’s get some famous people to tell us what they think and stuff;

Yes, let’s change it so we’re heard….if we’re on TV.

Our politics clapped out, bloody hell, can we part exchange it for a new bike instead?

Our whole political system is close to collapse!!! HOLY S**T! Save the children, ensure we die so they may live!

So pretty much from the Pro AV side of things, we as people who like scratching ourselves at the wrong time, aren’t told a great deal about the whole thing. You’re told the basic facts of why they want to get it changed, some pretty pictures of people we’ve seen in things and then that’s it. On your way now, nothing more to see here.

Now we turn to the dark side of the AV force, those who want things to remain as is or the “NO to AV” campaign, who by far seem to have the far more entertaining writers.

You see, they have resorted in a fancy colour leaflet, to scare the crap out of you and make you mad that all this is wasting money and that the BNP will get into power should you vote for AV. On the section where they compare the two systems on the table, there is a little bit of text for the One Person, One vote system, where you vote and whoever has the most votes win.

The AV system has the rest of the page detailing out with lots of numbers and words over several thousand different paragraphs how if you add 3 + 2 then take away 5 then order number 12 with a side order of 34, the terrorists win. It also illustrates that only a couple of countries round the world use such a system, and even they are looking to change it to something that involves everyone getting a free puppy.

But the tour de force has to be the back cover, at which basically you are taken through a lovely account of why Nick Clegg is such a bastard;

It takes you what Nick’s failed to deliver on since the Pirates took office, ensuring the image reminds you of the whole tuition fee issue, making your blood boil till liquid hate spills from every hole and the reasons why he wants this vote to go ahead, but basically you may as well read the back of the leaflet as this;

Effectively the creative people for the No to AV campaign have been a lot more colourful in how they have put their argument across for their side, and for the majority of people, it’s more than likely this sort of thing will win out, that is, if they actually care about it.

Captain David Cameron (White knight of hope, defender of people who wear monocles) supports retaining the first-past-the-post system while first mate Nick (ooooh he is evil, remember that while he puts his wee-wee in your food) Clegg is campaigning for the switch to AV. The leader bloke from Labour that looks like he’s still being bullied for his lunch money and whose name it seems hardly anyone can remember, wants a change to AV but no-one’s really noticed him yet so it doesn’t count.

The media has been caught up with various disasters of late to fully cover this upcoming potential change so in essence, when it comes to the 17 people who will actually turn up for the vote to put their decision down (probably in order of preference, take that AV! Kapow!) they will just be thinking; will it make a difference what I put?

The answer is basically no for the most part, as it appears at the ground level, nothing ever changes regardless of what happens. On the other hand, what’s the worst that can happen, if AV is a failure, can’t we simply change it back?