This week, in-between the fun and frolics to be had by Charlie Sheen’s lawsuit against Warner Brothers for loosing his job by being a complete gimp, and of course David Cameron’s attempts to show us all on various TV shows that he is a nice bloke after all and not the pirate captain of the good ship “Doomed”, it’s been just a bad week for the Liberians and the Japanese.

The news from Japan seems to be changing so much, that even David Bowie’s Ch-ch-changes song couldn’t keep up, and has meant that all the jokes about Japan stored up to be wheeled out when required, seem inappropriate to use.

Since Friday which brought about an earthquake, which at first, we would have assumed Godzilla was coming to destroy Tokyo again, instead turned out to be the worst earthquake in the country’s recorded history, with hundreds of aftershocks have continued to batter the coast of Japan offering no respite for survivors.

The human cost is feared to be in the thousands with many feared dead in the “Mr. Miyagi” prefecture and 190 people exposed to radiation from one of the many settings for the new series of the Incredible Hulk to begin; the Nuclear plants badly damaged in the aftermath, where cooling failures have meant that in order to ensure that further damage and explosions are limited, either Titan or the Japanese are now pumping sea water into the tanks into the chambers to cool down the “David Banner mad, Hulk smash” fuel rods.

The Japanese PM, whose name I could not pronounce unless it was number 35 with a side order of 12, called this event the “worst crisis since WWII” for the country, which given the scale of the devastation, doesn’t appear to be an understatement.

However one thing which sends the leisurely spider senses tingling and not in a good way, is that the news channels have remarked time and time again on the fact that Japan is more prepared than most countries for earthquakes and as a developed country should be able to deal with all the problems that stem from earthquakes, but bugger that, it still doesn’t help when the sh*t hits the fan, then proceeds to take various buildings with it, you’re still going to have a disaster on your hands!

Then again one might start questioning why Nuclear power stations are built in unstable environments where this sort of thing happens quite often, but then again that’s going to be for the aftermath and the reconstruction efforts, of which one can be rest assured, every builder and their army of polish workers will be competing for. For now, we can only hope that they receive the help they need as what New Zealand needed, and that Ooh Sometimes doesn’t get sued for the bad Japanese jokes.

And then we return to Libya. Oh what fun is in store.

Last time we visited what was happening in the region, the one question was Whose Libya is it anyway? With the further line being regretfully it seems to be an answer left open until something dramatic happens, and more blood is shed. Well, Libyan forces supporting the rubber faced tw*t Colonel Saunders Bummar Gaddafi (not Khadaffi as the US press has been spelling it) advanced on rebel-held strongholds, and reportedly recapturing the eastern town of Brega.

Dozens of rebel fighters pulled out of the area amid heavy shelling, and it seems they have also been losing other ground for days, including the key oil port of Ras Lanuf on Saturday. Meanwhile back at the lodge, the UK and French governments said it would speed up its efforts to persuade the international community to impose a no-fly zone over Libya, which was helped by the Arab League basically saying “Dude.” which of course is the universal word that means business.

Which means it will happen in the next 5 years. Remember kids, politics works.

And this week it emerged that the celebrity world has been remembering that Journalists and other enterprising gimps with nothing better to do than search for stuff on the internet tend to dig into things and bring up the past, and have been donating in their droves all the money paid to them by the Gaddafi clan to perform in their presence.

The list that has received money in the past from the lovable Gaddafi clan (it’s on the Guardian site for all to see) includes Nelly Furtado, Mariah Carey, Usher (who was taking drinks orders….oh not that kind of usher), Lionel Richie (You are my Dictator, sorry destiny), Beyonce (who probably also used the opportunity to offload more toilet water duty free to all that attended) and Jay-Z, who probably used the money to make more music videos involving women getting wet over how many speedboats he has.

Remarkable that a little civil war in Libya suddenly inspires people to donate money to charity. If one was cynical about the whole thing, you might think that they are doing simply to ensure that people don’t get the wrong idea and then begin hating them and not buy their stuff. But no, that would be silly and we should trust them.

Join us next time when we look at the best rocks to crawl under when it all gets too much.