Like the inevitable rise and setting of the sun, the tide of the sea changing and the stupidly absurd rush to the supermarkets to buy everything before it’s all gone simply as they are shut for one day over Christmas; here is another update on what’s new in the life of the Lord of Leisure.

Friday didn’t exist until 1 O’clock this afternoon after a going to bed late, furiously trying to sort out the UberBeast of the machine at home while writing that little synopsis of the Golden Jigsaw puzzle. One venture was successful; the other was not so joyful, and quite annoying.

You will see the results of that in a future post, one which will be strictly for the computer people out in the world but it will contain information for those who are none technical as this will in fact be something you will have to deal with in the future yourselves, and not just when you get a new machine as what most people tend to do these days (providing of course they can afford anything anymore.)
So now some of you will be quaking in your boots awaiting the post of doom, I’ll move onto more seasonal things.

Until next Thursday I shall be away from work, working on other nice things such as packing for the trip away, which shouldn’t take long, and still trying desperately to think of the last few bits for only 3 people now, the rest have been sorted with various bits of tat, normally the things that people receive because you cannot possibly think of anything else they would like, but who gives a brown smudge resembling material passing from people’s bottoms?

It’s the thought that counts.

But I ask the question: what thought counts exactly? There are lots of thoughts which occur on a daily basis but some of them clearly should never fall into the public domain ever, let alone at Christmas time.
On the plus side, the extra money received from working the coal mines in deepest, darkest south America with the rest of the gringos has stabilised the bank balance somewhat, granted it’s only two weeks before the red line is once again breached but better that than being there after getting paid. More comes in the new year, as I will be working extra for two weeks straight, thus aiding the objective of Operation “Oh dear god, we better do something before the nasty bank people start doing naughty.”

Another exciting moment on Guitar Hero has been reached, which is a big surprise for me but then again staying in and doing nothing else but breaking your fingers on the toy fisher price guitar would surely at some point yield a result. I have finished the songs on Easy thus allowing me to get the Grim Reaper Character to play as when attempting to play the songs again on Medium, which is a huge jump from easy. You see, at the time of reviewing the game some time ago, I didn’t know that going from easy to medium was likened to being kicked in the balls.

An extra button is added making it more difficult but also the speed of the notes is increased it seems by 100%, with the notes going all over the place with various combinations all combining to making you wanting to insert the guitar into someone and walk away like David Banner at the end of every episode to the Incredible Hulk. Cue Piano.

Tuesday I never remarked on so here’s the opportunity for me to gorge you all silly on happenings. I went to spend the evening with Steve, Kristi, Matt and Natalie in Shrewsbury while playing Guitar Hero 3 on the Xbox 360 on the uber huge screen with projector that Steve acquired after selling his body on the street to various women in need of comfort.

After strumming so long I wanted a pair of new hands, we settled down for some gloriously round pizza and attempted to play poker. Unfortunately having never played that before, I ended up with the situation that Northern Rock is now in, and was borrowing chips all the time from the bank and going through them like Peter Stringfellow goes through 16 year old girls.

But still we learned a few things, first, Natalie is a hustler and carefully guards the money like a hawk and secondly what is Steve’s is Kristi’s and what is Kristi’s is Kristi’s, so that means I wouldn’t want to guess. Then again this may be what marriage is. Anyone who would like to correct me, please do so.

Poker is one of the oldest pastimes there is alongside spitting from a bridge aiming for someone, and hotwiring cars. It’s an interesting game to chat over, discussing things of the day, more relaxing, you can lie to win and be more sociable over than Guitar Hero, and you can at least talk about Poker in public, although there are lots of jokes about “Poker” and women I could come with but that’s best left to the various Christmas crackers to be opened next week.

And at some point I guess I’ll have to go back to the gym as I have been feeling bloated and run down of late, having caught yet another bout of the manful, with sore throat symptoms which resembles the tonsillitis trouble I had at the beginning of this year. Still ‘tis the season to eat far too much so it’s just a guess of fitting in, though not into any clothes any more.

I could carry on waffling but I have wrapping to do and something else equally none constructive so for now dear campers, I leave with this question:

Are Christmas decorations a health and safety hazard? If so, have you met anyone who killed themselves on tinsel?

Good night.